Saved by the Bell "The Single Years"

I realized last night that all my friends have passed me up and are in relationships. How did I miss this memo? Did I drop it accidentially when I was going through all my Rolling Stone mags? Either way I missed it and here I am, single as usual. So all this realization comes to me at the Black Keys concert last night as I see my ex with his current girlfriend. Then I have my friend telling me how she's going to move in with her boyfriend, thinking of my other close girlfriends and how they are in serious relationships and I wonder how did I get this independence? I didn't ask for it, I too would like to bask in the giddiness of young love again but I think I just created this invisible wall around me. I don't let anyone in, at all. But then even if I am able to let someone "in", how do I even go about getting someone remotely interested in me?

I sound like I'm whinning now. Not what I wanted to do with this blog. I want to be able to live in that Sex and the City, New York, fast paced, and non-judging to the relationship challenged lifestyle that I see on T.V. I hate being that one girl in the group that will forever be the 5th wheel in everything. I hate the dreaded So are you seeing anyone question that I hear all the time. Man that's almost as bad as the so what do you plan on doing now question that I got when I graduated college. That question still sends chills down my spine.

I think I noticed a trend in the males that I've come faced with. They always perceive me as their alternate plan. For instance, the few that have shown a slight interest in me will like me untill they meet someone else. Then they decide to persue that girl, but if it doesn't work out they know good ol' single Val will be there. Ten times out of ten, their relationship lasts and I am slowly and surely erased out of their minds. Happens all the time. This is where you throw in your advice like, oh Val that guy wasn't worth it, your so much better than him. OH YEA!!! IF I'M SO MUCH BETTER.... WHY CAN'T I HAVE HIM!!!!

So now your looking at completely numb Val. I don't approach guys, and I can no longer tell if guys are even giving me the time of day or not. I just stopped noticing. But also I've become filled head to toe with this odd shyness towards the opposite sex now. I get ridicously insecure and I feel like I'm a moron. I hate this! I just want to meet someone where I can be my dorkish self. I can wear my glasses and retainer and he won't judge me. I want to be able to laugh so hard that I snort and he thinks it's cute. Ok I need to lay off the Lifetime Movie Network cause the liklihood of that happening is really slim. You know what's a good movie by the way, Bridget Jones Diary. Thank you! Thank you for making a movie where the girl is awkward but still has that sex appeal that every woman wants. She has meat on her but she will still wear that sheer top and mini skirt to work. She looks great in a dress but is wearing some massive granny panties underneath. Thank You for being a real woman with quirks and bad habits and still can get that guy. Alright, I think I just motivated myself.

Raise your martini glasses all you single ladies with character!!

Your pal,
-val-